Nature's Mystery Toy: The Reason Gen Z Are 'Unboxing' Conkers?

Identity: Horse chestnuts.

Age: Introduced to the UK over four centuries back.

Look: Nature's collectible doll.

No, I don’t think that’s right. Absolutely. Check out a social media video of someone unboxing a conker, and you’ll almost certainly hear them call it “the earth's Labubu”.

Unboxing conkers? What on earth are you talking about? Goodness, you are definitely not up to date, aren’t you? Young people are using social platforms to film themselves unpeeling conkers from their prickly shells.

But why? Due to the feeling of amazement! When you unbox a conker, you never know what you’re going to get. Will it be big? Might it be flattened? How shiny will it be? It is similar to a surprise package every time!

Are Labubus big and flat and shiny? No, they’re somewhat eerie dolls that have become collectible because they are sold in mystery boxes.

Can someone please tell the younger crowd that they are doing conkers wrong? Are they? How do you play with horse chestnuts, then?

Thread a lace through the center, and try to destroy everyone else’s conkers. Wow, really? That’s bizarre.

Yes. Your odds improve if you leave it in vinegar and then heat it in the oven. Seriously?

Truly. And should you gather an excess, you can toss them in the schoolyard and all the other kids will compete to grab them. A lovely item from nature like a conker, and you use it as a weapon? A weapon that comes with a lengthy list of arcane and bewildering rules?

That's the custom! King Charles literally just presented the global conker competition with a gift of 300 conkers! At least young people are just recording videos.

Why don’t you know this? At a guess, because certain schools prohibited the game twenty years back, due to various health and safety fears.

The modern world never fails to amaze me. Maybe revealing horse chestnuts just doesn't appeal to you. In which case, perhaps you would be more interested in some other hot new youth fads.

Oh really? Like what? Well, there’s this thing called yarn work, and something else called pottery that I can explain to you.

We’ve had knitting and pottery for centuries! Let me guess, you boil the needles in cider and then use them to jab one another?

Certainly not! OK, relax. I assumed that all old-people traditions involved some type of aggression, after that conker thing.

This is overwhelming. Take a breath. If you need me, I’ll be unboxing seeds for clicks.

Appropriate comment: “Social media loves showcasing nut discoveries.”

Don’t say: “This is nuts.”